The Steep Slope

In life, there are times when we tremble upon a question very loud and clear in our heads: Is this, whatever we are about to do, right or wrong! My personal question.. why do we end up asking so to ourselves?? If we already knew the answer to it, then where did the question come in from??? If the answer stays in put, then what is the doubt about ???? Discovery? Probably we ask our very inner layer, our soul and expect it to take us to the right answer. Is that what we refer to as “gut??” Do we no longer aspire to ask any questions when we are happy? That reminds of God. That reminds me on how mostly when people are low on lives is when they ask for mercy, blames are pointed towards him., and since as they say that God resides in every human being, and we don’t know whether we should believe it or not but still not ignoring all the odds, ARE OUR SOULS, GOD?????? Is this why they are first at everything? First in entering our bodies and the very first ones to leave it? The first ones to get hurt and the first ones to mend it ? Is it keeping us alive? Is it really stopping us from the things that we do wrong? And if its really this powerful , then well, according to science, no one should do anything wrong but this is not a perfect world, we also know that every one makes mistakes. Small or big but they do. Is it so that while running on the crossroads of life, some times we lose our way/our path/our journey to where we actually wanna go and in turn make mistakes ? DOES IT TAKE US TO AN EDGY SCARY LOOKING DOWNFALL????? Do our souls get weak and do the wrong things at times too ?

Fighting with myself all along, i wonder if it was a right decision to let him go. Let him go and build our future knowing that the answer lies very much in the question but from time to time, why do i end up meeting my soul on a see-saw? Why do i never see myself on the top? Am i really that dependent that i always want him to lift me up ??? Why does it look so scary on this slope? Is the angle not right? Are we really doing the math wrong??? Why does my soul not compliment my mind.. And when all of it inside me goes off track on such a perpendicular path, whom do i raise the question to ? Is this why finding your soul-mate so important, because when you know that it fits just perfect, no road looks dangerous anymore, no slope seems steep enough, no hurdle blocks the way and no amount of strength can do them away ?? Like every one, does the soul feel the need to have a partner only because of this reason? Am i getting close to my answer, is this why its scary all the time? I knew i had him but i still let him go.. Do i wanna take this negative side of the road or should i try harder to fix the angle to know that the same road is getting us closer , that in the see-saw of life, from his end he is gradually lifting me up??? If one can lose their way this easy in life, does it mean that they can find the right route in the same manner ????? Does a simple swing like this built up as a roller-coaster in our minds???? Should we just keep following our hearts and souls to meet at a common point and make a balanced life????

So many unanswered questions but still somehow i feel like with every word out here, i am finding my answers, i don’t think that i am receiving them in my brain, but its going inside somewhere in my body, fixing things right up. Only if …. my soul …. meets that of his, and we share the sun and the moon at the very same time till eternity. It will probably bring a stop to my questions! And well here is my answer i guess. All we need to do is have the same time to observe the nature, which could be as simple as sharing a morning coffee no matter how steep the slope is, we will fall, we will get up, we will laugh it out, sometimes we will get hurt so bad that we  will cry but we still will be a big “WE” and that will cure all of it.

Lets let the LOVE > DISTANCE , for now! forever!! And why not ? If it could be in sickness and in health till death parts us then i have another clause to add to it! Sickness! Health! The Steep Limestone Cliffs! Till death parts us..!

So, do i take a decision of looking to the upside of this downfall?

I DO ❤

Advertisements

SO(u)LITUDE

A state of being alone+Soul=SO(u)LITUDE

A state where you are out and out and there is not a single ear to listen out to you. Imagine! A dark night, an empty street, and you. Not a single stray out there, not even a moon to give you light w.r.t. no friends, a big family but not one person to listen to the way you actually are, not even a stranger. Only you . Even your soul gives up on you at that time !!! When it gives up on being inside you for so many years like it never existed. Its so weak now, so hollow and nothing constant! Not even the pain. Even a cry for help cant help you at that time because you are oh so fragile to even let the tears roll out of your eyes. The soul is so ice cold at this time , so numb that it can’t feel a dam thing. All you barely see are huge buildings in front of you but they are so far off that its impossible to reach them. While walking you realize that even your own shadow has now left you. Every step give birth to the death of aged hopes. You can’t listen to your breath now. There is literally no one down that road but YOU.

You want to sleep, the brain wants to do the opposite of thinking, lips want to stop the talking, fingers want to stop talking, the heart wants to stop beating, lungs are breathing out a smoke of cigarette but an inch of strength in the dreaded soul wants to crawl to that building, its like my own soul has turned into a ghost, when you know that it will be far more easier to jump and die from one, but still wants to reach out there, call for the love which is lost somewhere in the land of skyscrapers. The architecture and beauty of it is so mesmerizing that it can even give life to the almost lifeless soul. The future from here somewhere looked so attractive that the soul cannot be a citizen of the Solitude. It wants the dazzle to chisel its life up in the most fascinating way. Why has this distance become so dominant on the soul? Why can’t it be vice-versa?? Why can’t souls from each end of the world keep it intact???? Why does this time not pass???? Why does it feel like every hour without him is an ungodly hour ??? Is the soul an asthma patient that it can’t find its breath in his absence???? How can one be assured that after dragging it till the destination, peace would be found???? Will all the bruises be for nothing???? The inner layer of the body now feels in a comma, i wonder if it will be able to reach out its way.

Can any one of you out there answer me as to how will it feel if suddenly you came to know that instead of two months, six months of your life have been taken away ? Will your soul still be your companion?????

To that and nothing happy I leave to you this piece in the very hope of any one of you who shares a mutual feeling out there with me, its here, that you will find peace.

So(u)litude… Will we be ever able to bring the souls together to make one single altitude to reach to the height of those buildings, hence our relationship ??

Amen!